Home | Friday 9th May 2008 | Issue 631

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...AND FINALLY...

Two teenage girls kitted out with assault vests and sub-machine guns pose proudly for photos. Not in Sudan or Afghanistan, but East Kilbride, Scotland. The girls were allowed to handle the weapons by cops at the ‘high security’ firearms unit in Jackton. This was apparently a “treat” after their father, who was a police officer, died suddenly – so brandishing automatic weapons is the latest course of treatment for grieving children. However - being tuned in, net savvy, hep cats the girls posted the pictures on their Bebo site, with the caption “Who you gonna call?” (presumably not East Kilbride’s finest). The day out which was described by one of the sisters as “Overall a day of riots and police dogs. Such a skive from school!” Police sources later apologised saying the photo-shoot had been “wrong on a number levels”.

Cue hasty statement from Strathclyde Police as to why the girls were allowed to handle guns which aren’t allowed into the hands of ordinary cops: “part of the process of coming to terms with the untimely loss of their father”. Not entirely sure whether the police are qualified to provide grievance counselling, but it’s pretty clear they’re certainly not qualified to carry any kind of gun.

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